Forward Note: I just had a birthday, and I can't help but feel so grateful to be a part of such a large Autism community. Sometimes, we have some rough days with Dylan. Somedays, I question why I was chosen to have a child with ASD. When Dilly has his meltdowns, I feel utterly helpless. I know he needs to get it out of his system, but my maternal instincts kick in, and I want to make it all better. There are some things that are just beyond my control, and that's a tough pill to swallow. When I feel this way, it's nice to hear from other parents who are going through the same thing. As I said in my last blog, I'm at the very beginning of a lifelong journey. So, please continue to reach out with questions/comments/suggestions. I truly look forward to hearing from all of you.
Email:maynard1280@gmail.com
IG: shaymaydoug
FB: Sharon Maynard-Douglas
***I'm now on periscope:*** Username: maynard1280
***I'm also now on twitter!*** Username: cocoamomslp
I'm so excited to debut my oldest cocoa bean, Darien Douglas a.k.a #darichronicles! My Dari is 7, and in the 2nd grade. He's obsessed with reading, and TMNT (Ninja Turtles). He's pretty much my mini me. For 4 years, it was just the 3 of us. When I got pregnant with Dill, he did not take it so well. Mainly because I was so sick, and I couldn't give him the attention he was used to getting from me. He started acting crazy in school. Negative attention is better than no attention at all, right? By the end of the pregnancy, he moved on from anger to jealousy. We all went out of our way to make him feel extra special in his new role as big brother. It was touch and go the first year, but he has become an amazing big brother.
How do you explain Autism to a 7 year old? Well, I did a little online researching before I brought it up to Dari. Even before the official ASD diagnosis, Darien was always asking about how he could help Dilly to better communicate? I personally, and professionally don't feel it is necessary for him to know everything about Autism. He won't understand the complexities of it. However, when a situation arises, he will be aware of why Dilly reacts the way he does.
For example: Dilly's first instinct is to scream. It drives Darien crazy. When he gets really frustrated, he may even yell back(those are rare occasions). Hey, he's human, right? Helping Darien to understand that Dilly's brain works differently, and providing him with relatable explanations will help him to be more tolerant. He also follows how my husband( who will be making his blog debut very soon!), and I interact with Dill. It's so funny to watch him cue Dylan to use his words, in the same manner that I use. Kids are seriously always watching. There was one incident where Dilly kept screaming because he wanted help opening his box of legos. I'm watching Darien ignore him. Eventually, Dilly stopped screaming and stood right in front of Darien.
Darien : "Oh, did you want something Dylan?"
Dill: " Oh, yes"
Dari: " What do you need?"
Dill: " I want open box please"
It's the kind of scenario that I LIVE for! If only it were always that simple!
In the past, Darien saw Dylan as his annoying little brother who he always had to take care of. In recent months, we have noticed a shift in their relationship dynamic. He now sees Dilly as someone he can play with. Dilly's language skills are on the rise, and without realizing it, Darien is really a huge part of that. Children learn best through play. **When I walk around with my big IKEA bag full of toys, I know other professionals feel as if my job is easy. I assure you, we use toys for a reason. Get some toys, and follow the child's lead.** This is something Darien does very well. I truly enjoy watching them play together. Darien is an amazing big brother, and I know that he will always look out for Dilly.
That's my Darien. He's Awesome. He takes after his Godmother.
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